No more, for a very long time.

I've decided for focus on more important things than having a relationship, like school and tight friends. I'm over having someone on the go constantly, and having someone else to worry about, I want to move the fuck on with my life. It doesn't mean my feelings for anyone change, I just wont act on them.

 Okay, here you go, my dress and hair (:

'son, if I died on my bed room floor, would you cry on your bed room floor?'
Work will pick up for me soon, which is good I miss the boys, as I am the only female and non Asian person at work (:
I have photos for you. One is me in my leavers dress, other is how I'm getting my hair cut. I shall put them in another post, for some reason they wont work right now.
oh I'm going to the Hobart cup with the girls, I nearly bought a dress today, but decided that I want a real quality dress not a dress from valley girl. You know me. I'm also saving for a mini ghd straightener. So I can straighten my hair when it's short (: Well shorter.
 oh by the way, I'm going to Rosny, so you'll see my arty farty face around I guess.
Art Appreciation 3C, Art Production - Visual Art 3C, Modern World History 3C, Maths Applied 2C, Concert Band and Costume Design 2A (: no free lines either. I'm rather excited.

FUCK

fucking wicked.
'I don't want to be this way, I want to be normal'
remember? I used to be useful, I used to help. It make me feel wanted, me being around made a difference. I felt it, I need that feeling.
FUCK.
In that mood where everything pisses me off. I work often, and i just want to come home to you every night, I think about it every night. I need my music.
ahhh thats better.
you know me, soothes me, it just makes everything wash away. I just listen to the music and the tones, it's just heaven.
Breathe Casey just breathe.
Ah, to walk in and see you on that gross white leather couch of yours watching tv and to just flop into your arms after a night of work would be lovely.

temptaion

One point tonight, I needed you so bad.
So bad.
But I left it, I don't want to trouble you, I really don't. I wish it was different, where I wasn't always in your way. I wish it, I do.
Regardless of where you are, or what you're doing, if you want me to or don't, I'll think about you. I want you to know that you deserve the best, you work so hard, and seriously, you're going to be sooo wealthy. I can just see it. Being that successful husband, that wears a suit and has an attractive wife and children, I know it. I hope you get everything that you wish for. This is it for me. I try and make it everything I can but, I live a very boring life.
Surround yourself with happiness, and never let me stop you from doing anything, ever. I'm not important, hell, I'm not even real. It's obvious that the past is the past and that it needs to stay that way, but I'll always love you. Though you disagree, I am always here, always, to fall back on.
It's late and I have a full day of performing tomorrow so. I best be off.

Take care. I miss sleeping.

It's time

fly away,
It's time for us to grow apart, for ever.
You no longer need me.
go, try out the new toys.
Hell go through the entire store.
But let go of this old rag doll, it's time to throw her in the bin
it's time to not let her drag you down,
go out and get a new one.
just for you.